Light Notes

Calling my daughters turns into losing proposition

Something is bugging me.

It’s the excuses I hear from my daughters while they’re on their cell phones.

“Sorry, mom, I’m going into the underground garage and I’ll probably lose you in . . . “

CLICK.

“I’ve got to order at the drive-thru, mom. Joshua, do you want to talk to Gran . . . “

CLICK.

“Uh oh, I can’t hear you very well. You’re starting to break . . . “

CLICK.

OK., I can take a hint. I know they’re busy, but I like to stay connected.

The worst excuse yet came from daughter Tiffany while on her car-speaker phone at rush hour.

“Eeeek!!!!! There’s a big bug--Yikes! It’s a spider!!--on my rear view mirror! He’s going to dive! I’ve got to . . .”

CLICK.

Didn’t Tiffany know that if she would have just stayed on the line, I’d have reminded her that a spider is not a bug and besides, objects always look bigger in the car mirror? Or at least that’s what is printed on the glass.

I’d have also told her that millions of people have arachnophobia and it would be best not to toss the arachnid into traffic.

Besides that, spiders are generally looking for food and that’s why it selected her vehicle where an array of leftovers is strewn about.

And to calm her nerves, couldn’t she pause and sing Itsy Bitsy Spider or contemplate Charlotte’s Web and what a nice spider she was?

But no, Tiffany didn’t stay connected.

Oh well, at least you’ve been able to read about . . .

CLICK.

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