What is going on with Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson?
Is he asking for too much money? Is that the reason he can’t find an action-movie script that fits his limited skills?
Johnson’s stock has slipped from ex-superstar wrestler and Scorpion King and action-icon heir apparent to donning Dollar Store lace wings and a tutu to play a tooth fairy.
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We must be realistic. Johnson is not close to a good actor. He is — however — big and buff. Johnson can realistically bop bad guys, blow things to smithereens with machine guns, cannons or whatever futuristic weapons producers and writers develop.
Now he’s wearing a tutu.
Though I’m not a fan, I do know his fans want to see the former wrestler be The Rock. They want action movies. It’s sad to see someone with so much potential fall so far. He’s now akin to Vin Disel, Jackie Chan and former gangsta Ice Cube — relegated to PG movies and babysitting kids that don’t like him.
Let’s get on with the matter at hand: Tooth Fairy.
Johnson plays a has-been major league hockey player relegated to the minor leagues where he builds a reputation for thuggery. Players he hits lose teeth, thus the title. Almost telling his girlfriend’s too-cute-to-be-true daughter there is no tooth fairy gets him sentenced to two-weeks duty as a real tooth fairy. Armed with an arsenal of shrink paste, forget-me-dust, a dog barking mint and other gizmos, Johnson’s machismo is severely tested as he sprouts wings at inopportune times and flits hopelessly from one stupid sit-com scene to the next.
January is a movie dumping ground. Theaters are jammed with after thoughts. Films that seem like a good idea at the time, get produced and knowing they’re total bombs, the studios wait until this month to deliver the not-so-good goods.
Every year has a best example. Tooth Fairy is this year’s. Not even the awful but sometimes clever tooth jokes, puns and word twists or a funny cameo from Billy Crystal help this one.
Give it a root canal.
Better yet, pull the tooth.
Mr. Movie rating: 1 star
Rated PG for mature themes. It opens Friday, Jan. 22 at Regal’s Columbia Mall 8 and at the Fairchild Cinemas 12.
5 stars to 4 1/2 stars: Must see on the big screen
4 stars to 3 1/2 stars: Good film, see it if it's your type of movie.
3 stars to 2 1/2 stars: Wait until it comes out on video.
2 stars to 1 star: Don't bother.
0 stars: Speaks for itself.