Mr. Movie

'The International' -- a few spills, no thrills

On paper this thriller is a good one.

Key words: on paper.

Executives of an evil international bank are shaping the political world by funding revolution, smuggling arms and controlling governments. A brave Interpol cop and a Manhattan Assistant D.A. are determined to stop them.

Clive Owen and Naomi Watts star. He’s the cop. She’s the attorney. Continually thwarted and running out of time to prove their case, the two stars and others chase leads around the globe while, in turn, being chased by the bank’s legion of bad guys.

Nothing much happens at the many stops. In fact, so little happens in first time writer Eric Singer’s script and director Tom Tykwer’s (Perfume: the Story of a Murderer) movie that there is virtually nothing to critique.

The story is bland. The performances are bland. There was nowhere for the plot to go and nowhere for this review to go.

The end. Roll credits.

Mr. Movie rating: 1 star

Rated R for mature themes, violence. It opens Friday, Feb. 13 at the Carmike 12 and Fairchild Cinemas 12.

5 stars to 4 1/2 stars: Must see on the big screen

4 stars to 3 1/2 stars: Good film, see it if it's your type of movie.

3 stars to 2 1/2 stars: Wait until it comes out on video.

2 stars to 1 star: Don't bother.

0 stars: Speaks for itself.