Connecting with pet loss: Tri-City vets help grieving owners

By Michelle Dupler, Herald staff writer

Since Liane Bennett's dog Vegas died in May after a yearlong struggle with cancer, she always keeps him close to her heart.

The West Richland woman sent some of Vegas's ashes to a company called Over the Rainbow in Whitefish, Mont., that incorporates the remains of beloved pets into works of art.

She now has a pendant of swirling blue -- resembling the water Vegas loved so much -- that she can wear to remember her companion of 12 1/2 years.

"It is absolutely beautiful," Bennett said. "He has always been in my heart."

She also has a suncatcher in blues and greens and feels Vegas's presence every time it captures a beam of sparkling sunlight.

"He's just right there," she said, her voice breaking as she spoke of her lost friend. "I say, 'Hi,' to it when I walk by, even though I know he's not ... there's a part of him in there."

For pet owners such as Bennett, losing a dog or a cat can bring grief just as real and painful as the loss of a human family member or friend, and so some Tri-City veterinary clinics offer an array of services to help pet owners through the experience.

"There can be a lot of guilt," said Brian Conrad, practice manager for Meadow Hills Veterinary Centers of Kennewick. "They can feel like they're giving up too soon or doing something wrong. We try to be supportive."

From the time the decision is made to let a pet go, Meadow Hills offers grieving pet owners a quiet, comforting atmosphere to spend those last moments together.

Staff members talk about options -- whether to be in the room when the pet is euthanized, or to bury or cremate the pet once the procedure is done.

"This isn't something we rush at all," Conrad said. "Some of these pets have been with them for 10 or 15 years. It is a hard decision for them."

The clinic offers support materials -- booklets and brochures about coping with grief -- as well as ways to remember the pet through a clay paw imprint or perhaps a tuft of hair wrapped in a bow.

Staff members sometimes send flowers or make a donation to a veterinary school in the pet's name, Conrad said.

"The biggest thing is time and compassion and understanding," he said. "We all have different times when we think it's time to say when. It is going to be different for all of us."

For Bennett, she knew the time had come when Vegas suffered a series of nosebleeds nearly a year after she was told that cancer likely would kill him in two weeks to six months.

The black Labrador/golden retriever mix had a mass on his spleen that ruptured in June 2008. She took him to Meadow Hills for surgery, then home for what she thought were the remaining weeks of his life.

"He made it two weeks short of a full year," she said.

He'd seemed normal during that time other than some weakness in his hind legs that made it difficult for him to jump into her SUV, she said.

But the day a friend provided her with a professional photo session for Vegas, her companion got his first bloody nose.

"I knew at that time it was the beginning of the end," she said.

Vegas was prescribed antibiotics and pain pills during an emergency veterinarian visit, and seemed normal again, but soon the night came when Bennett woke to find Vegas vomiting and unable to get up.

"The look in his eyes, I knew it was time," she said.

Another trip to an emergency veterinary clinic ended with the difficult decision to put Vegas to sleep.

"I wanted to be with him," Bennett said. "He laid with his head in my lap. ... I think he knew, and he was ready."

Once the staff at Meadow Hills heard about Vegas, they sent Bennett flowers. It was this gesture that prompted her to send a thank you note and a photo to the clinic so they could remember Vegas, too.

Benita Cherry, a veterinary technician at VCA Animal Medical Center in Richland, said creating pet remembrances can be therapeutic for the clinic staff as well as the pet owners.

Cherry makes clay paw imprints for the Richland clinic's clients using Sculpey clay that she takes home, bakes in an oven to harden, then decorates with the pet's name, glaze, paint and ribbons.

She's made the imprints not only for dogs and cats, but also smaller pets such as squirrels, a duck and a chameleon.

As a 12-year employee at the clinic, she knows many of the pets who are put to sleep.

"It's a way for me to remember each pet I have known through the years," Cherry said.

She also loves knowing that the imprints can help a grieving pet owner. She told the story of a blind client who had to have a guide dog euthanized. Because he was blind, he only knew his dog through touch and having the imprint was like having his pet there, she said.

"It was so cool we were able to help him in that way to have an impression he could feel," she said.

-- On the net: Meadow Hills, www.mhvc.net

-- VCA Animal Medical Center, www.vcahospitals.com/animal-medical-center-richland

-- Over the Rainbow, www.otrmemorials.com

* Michelle Dupler: 509-582-1543; mdupler@tricityherald.com

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Sunday, Nov. 15, 2009

Connecting with pet loss: Tri-City vets help grieving owners

By Michelle Dupler, Herald staff writer