Did You Hear about the Morgans?
Referring to the title: probably not. And you don’t really want to either.
Marc Lawrence (Miss Congeniality) casts Hugh Grant and Sarah Jessica Parker as the soon-to-divorce Morgans. In New York, they see a murder and are whisked off to Wyoming and witness protection.
Never miss a local story.
Guess what? They fall back in love in a grind on you, tedious, annoying, TV-movie-of-the-week style. Viewers unfortunate enough to have watched TV movies of the week when the networks had several a week, will find themselves doing lines along with the characters.
It is that predictable.
And at least TV movies of the week — badly written as they were — had a purpose. They took up a time slot and sold advertising. There is no purpose whatsoever for Did You Hear about the Morgans?
And who heard about the Morgans? No one. You’re not introduced to friends or family. Two assistants doubling as “comedy” relief are the only people missing the Morgans and you get the sense that the two actors playing the parts were as bored with the premise as the leads.
I feel bad for Grant, Parker and co-stars Sam Elliot and Mary Steenburgen. They get stuck in the worst, most disjointed, cliche and pointless script of the year.
Forget witness protection, with this one it is you that need protection — “witless” protection.
Mr. Movie rating: 1 stars
Rated PG-13 for mature themes. It opens Friday, Dec. 18 at Regal’s Columbia Mall 8 and at the Fairchild Cinemas 12.
5 stars to 4 1/2 stars: Must see on the big screen
4 stars to 3 1/2 stars: Good film, see it if it's your type of movie.
3 stars to 2 1/2 stars: Wait until it comes out on video.
2 stars to 1 star: Don't bother.
0 stars: Speaks for itself.