Gary Wolcott's "Mr. Movie" column has appeared in the Tri-City Herald since 1992. The Tri-City native now lives in Portland, Ore., and watches about 250 movies each year. This member of Portland's association of movie critics, Far From Hollywood, believes movies are made to be seen on theater screens and should be seen there and not on television screens. Have a question for Mr. Movie? Click on "Add Comment" below. Mr. Movie has joined Twitter. Follow him here.
They arent that cool anyway. Pre-George Romero zombies werent all that scary. Since Romeros Night of the Living Dead they havent scored very high for heart-stopping fright either. Zombie plots pretty much meld together these days. One is interchangeable with another. Romero continues to be the king of the genre, but even he is out of ideas.
When youre out of ideas, twist the genre.
Zombieland is a twist on the genre twist. In 2004, Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright did Shaun of the Dead. It quickly became a cult favorite, is a complete crack-up and probably the second-best zombie movie ever. Horror never works better or is more believable than when combined with comedy.
To test the theory, a TV director and two guys one of whose only familiar screenwriting credits is Monsters, Inc. additional material cranked out Zombieland, a no-holds-barred, hilarious romp through an apocalypse.
The plot is the usual: Woody Harrelson, Jesse Eisenberg (Adventureland), Emma Stone (The House Bunny) and kid acting whiz Abigail Breslin play characters trying to find other humans and a safe-haven from the zombies.
Eisenbergs character sets the stage. He has a how-to-stay-alive rule for everything. Each time something dangerous happens, up pops the rule and you see how it applies on screen.
They are really funny, and the gag works.
Harrelson is one of the best head-case character actors of all-time. Hes in his element as a near-psychopathic zombie killer. His testosterone machismo mixes well with Eisenbergs lack of cojones. Eisenberg unfortunately is a zombie of a different kind. Hes actually an excellent young actor with the misfortune of having the same on-screen personality as the increasingly boring Michael Sera.
Stone and Breslin have a blast playing the guys-are-so-dumb routine. Theyre devious sisters willing to do anything to survive including ripping off the two guys, not once but twice.
Though Zombieland wont have you laughing so hard you drool on your chin or are in danger of snarfing, snorting or making other near-obscene sounds, it is creative, has terrific dialogue and a near perfect cameo from a surprise celebrity.
Give this one a bite of your weekend movie bucks.
Rated R for gore, violence and language. It opens Friday, October 2 at the Carmike 12 and at Fairchild Cinemas 12.
Mr. Movie rating: 4 1/2 stars
Rated PG-13 for mature themes. It opens today at the Columbia Mall 8 and at Fairchild Cinemas.
5 stars to 4 1/2 stars: Must see on the big screen
4 stars to 3 1/2 stars: Good film, see it if it's your type of movie.
3 stars to 2 1/2 stars: Wait until it comes out on video.
2 stars to 1 star: Don't bother.
0 stars: Speaks for itself.
On a company team-building outing, a cast of unknowns with the exception of David Koechner ( The Office ) ends up on a bridge being renovated. Nicholas D'Agosto's character, Sam, has a premonition, panics and everybody piles off the bus. They run for safety, the bridge does a spectacular collapse and everyone lives.
You can't cheat death. One at a time, death catches up with the characters, and they die in creative ways. That's the formula.
First-time major release director Steve Quale and first feature writer Eric Heisserer do a pretty good job with the predictable premise. And you have the option of seeing their creation in three-dimensions. The 3D is pretty good, too.
'Safe House' lots of camera movement for non-moving plot
The movie is Safe House . It is anything but safe.
Denzel Washington is Tobin Frost, a rogue agent the CIA has been hunting for years. He has a mysterious chip that a very violent group wants. They corner him and faced with certain death, Frost — who is in South Africa — turns himself in at the American Consulate.
Ryan Reynolds is Matt Weston. He’s a CIA rookie running the safe house. Nothing ever happens there. He spends every day alone with nothing to do. His safe his is where they take the captured Frost. The men chasing Frost seem to know he’s there. They raid the safe house, kill Frost’s elite guard forcing Weston and Frost go on the run.
I would have to say the creepiest thing about viruses is some people don't consider them to technically be alive.
That makes them kind of like bizarro zombies. Well, except I guess bizarro zombies would be more like corpses that come back to life and restore brains to those who've lost them, such as flat tax advocates. Or maybe they would just eat our feet instead? I'm a little confused about how this bizarro stuff works. Point is, it's not very cool when you have to fight something that can't be killed because it has no life to be killed. Also there are hundreds of millions of them inside you.
When a movie sits on a shelf for a year after the original release date is set it’s usually the kiss of death.
Plot flaws, bad acting, zero marketing budget and a host of other problems plague them.
This is not the case of the now-released The Debt or for last week’s Don’t be Afraid of the Dark . The official reason for the delay of both films is not plot problems or a marketing budget but the sale of distributor and art house fave Miramax.
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