For those of you waiting nearly 20 years for a remake of the Super Nintendo classic Super Mario Bros., the wait is over.

So I've been MIA for a while, but I have a good reason. No, it's not because I secretly moonlight as a ninja who had business to tend to in Korea... I gave that profession up years ago. And no, I didn't break into the Mountain Dew headquarters... I still need to finalize blueprints for that mission.

"Chicken wings and beer. Caviar and champagne. Japchae and Sauvignon Blanc. Wait, what was that last one?"

Aphrodisiacs in the form of liquor? Now you're talking.

A while back there was supposed to be a flash mob ninja fight at the mall in Kennewick, but the mall security found out about the event and put a stop to it.

Local music is often overlooked like day-old bagels. They're not bad, but people can get more fresh ones somewhere else.

Even though summer may be over, there’s still tons of good music to warm up to.

I've been the biggest Katamari fan ever since I was introduced to it in college. Katamari Damacy roughly translates to "clump spirit," which describes the game perfectly: A lot of clumping and a lot of spirit.

My biological clock is not ticking. There is no short fuse that will slowly burn down and explode my egg reserves. However, my partner's biorhythm is steadily speeding up. It's a bit backassward, but we're trying to figure out who needs to catch up or slow down.

Ever feel like people are watching you? Well, if you go to a certain coffee shop, you definitely will get that feeling - and no, it's not just you.

Life in my bubble is finally starting to return to normal. The spinning feeling is beginning to cease and my job is starting to pick back up. C'est la vie, no?

Weddings are a lot like lightening bolts. Blink, and you might miss them.

So previously I wrote about how to successfully plan a wedding. Be warned - no wedding goes off without some catastrophe.

I've often heard that when it comes to wedding planning, it's best to assume early on that the groom will never do enough to appease the bride-to-be.

When people go to Vegas, there's this weird instinct to document everything, even though they'd never actually show the footage to anyone, except maybe their future children in an effort to prove that they were once cool.

The time has come in every soon-to-be bride's life that she embarks on a journey with her closest girlfriends. There will be 4-inch heels. There will be plenty of lip gloss. There will be fake eyelashes. There will be Vegas... Are you not entertained?!

While a woman never reveals her age, high school reunions are a great way to figure it out. Pasco High's 10 year class reunion is today at 7 p.m. at Jack-son's in Kennewick. If you think that's old, Pasco's 30 year reunion is next Friday, Aug 14 at 6 p.m. See how the high school jock and cheerleader couple turned out. My guess is they're probably a bit flabbier...

No matter where you live, safety is always an issue. How safe the neighborhood is, how friendly the people are, how often the police do patrols, etc. In the back of your mind, you never stop worrying.

The time has come. Once a year my boss sneaks up behind us and asks, "Are you ready for the thunder?!" or something like that. My coworker, Wench Jeanie and I usually respond with blank stares.

I got to thinking the other day (yes, I actually do think), and started compiling a list of my top 5 favorite video game vixens of all time. Like John Cusack in High Fidelity, I love to make lists...

I used to think that Skyping sounded like doing something dirty in the privacy of your own home, or bathroom stall.

This week it's all about the music.

I don't care if it's a photo of a bowl of peas - if it's in focus and there's good lighting, I'll probably want to eat it.

What's the point of putting the final touches on a wedding invitation if the postal service is just going to tear them off?

In life, you come across many bumps in the road, but sometimes these bumps aren't metaphorical and are actually blown truck tires that are coming at you at full force.

There are so many games that people play when it comes to relationships. There's the cat 'n mouse of capturing your prey. The charade of being more cleanly than you actually are. There's the rouse that you genuinely care when in fact you just want them to shut up so you can go to sleep.

If you're a cat lover, you'll probably want to check out this site dedicated to LOL cats.

Ever come across pictures that were taken more than a decade ago? Imagine finding a home video from 1999. That's what it was like this weekend.

For those who still go to Starbucks... I am with you. The buttery goodness of a Grande Caramel Frappuccino is definitely worth not topping off your gas tank.

Is it just me, or are old people grocery shopping adorably awesome?

Have you ever gotten up after a night of binge drinking and found your car keys in the freezer box? Me neither... but I came close the other day.

You know what's not cool, movie goers? When the theater is empty and you sit behind the only person in the room. That deserves a kick in the shin. Maybe even a whip to the back of the head with a radio antenna.

Every time I tell people that I fish for shad, they look at me like I'm crazy. I suppose they're envisioning me with a plastic bucket, scooping up some sardine-sized tadpoles.

May is almost over and you know what that means? Well, yeah, that summer is here - but besides that. It means that Asian American Heritage Month is almost over, too.

People are envious of my job. I get to sit around and play on the Internet all day and get paid for it. This includes browsing the latest YouTube videos that people send me.

My future mother-in-law is a wonderful lady. She has years of knowledge and plenty of hilarious stories. Unfortunately, while her short-term memory may not be what it used to be, she can add this year's Mother's Day drama to her long-term collection of stories.

In case you missed it, IT Day 2009 has come and gone. Hundreds of people passed through the Three Rivers Convention Center, snatching up as much free swag as their complimentary IT Day bags could carry.

One of the coolest things by far was the Nintendo. I'm talking the original Nintendo, too. You had Duck Hunt, Zelda and the original Mario Bros.

Today is Earth Day, where we pretend to appreciate mother nature and all that she has done for us - then continue on our mundane existence of depleting the ozone.

So my brother got a tattoo. Or should I say, another tattoo. I think he has four, but I'm really not sure.

To my Sakura-Con brethren... I'll see you next year.

If there's one thing that I love, it's a good story line. Japanese animation provides infinite story arcs that have incredible climaxes. It's no wonder so many teenage geeks are into this genre.

Word on the street is there are Giant Cheetos now available for your chewing pleasure.

Nerdcore superstar Beefy sat down with me over some coffee for my first Vloggin' With BethZilla webisode.

In life, we tend to forget what makes us happy. Sometimes we'll cling onto that one, ever elusive thing that makes our worlds brighter, until we smother the living daylights out of it. And after that, it no longer makes you smile, but rather dry-heave at the very thought of it.

If I have a superpower, it's probably sending myself into a panic and then getting sick. I'm not a hypochondriac, but sometimes I wonder.

Ask any gamer where Chris Redfield is and they wouldn't know. Nobody knows. Until now.

First off, if you're looking for something to do this Friday the 13th, head on over to Ray's Golden Lion in Richland and watch three of my favorite hip-hop acts:

Both of our critics have reviewed the graphic-novel-turned-film Watchmen, so I won't bother throwing my two cents into the movie-reviewing fountain, except to say that it was mind-blowingly entertaining.

Let's talk movies. There aren't a lot of good ones out there at the moment.